Boredom is a universal human emotion. Anything that was once shiny and new inevitably becomes less shiny and less new, and then we find ourselves looking for the next distraction. We all learned this lesson the hard way during the pandemic. But it’s a good lesson: novelty takes effort.
Relationship boredom can take many forms, but therapists frequently describe it as a lack of interest in your partner or feeling nothing toward them. Both of those are death knells for any relationship—unless you’re both willing to do something about it.
Sex is frequently the culprit when people become bored in a relationship. The sex fizzles because the energy and attention have been replaced by routine and laziness. Returning your sexual interest to what it once was will take a little bit more than buying a new piece of lingerie. So, let’s talk about ten fun ways to ensure your relationship doesn’t get boring by incorporating sexting.
- Develop Your Dirty Talk Skills
Dirty talk is arousing for a lot of people. The trick is to find out which kind of dirty talk your partner likes best. Ask before you get started, and you can avoid awkward situations.
- Try BDSM
It’s a lot less anxiety-inducing to find out if you like BDSM when you’re sexting rather than on the business end of a whip. Play around with power exchanges to see if you like being in control or surrendering it. As always, get consent first.
- Act Out a Fantasy
You know that thing you’ve always been afraid to try? It’s a lot easier to do when you’re sexting. You can act out sex in public or another somewhat taboo fantasy during a sexting encounter—all without any legal ramifications.
- Play with a Fetish
Fetish and kink aren’t the same things. A fetish is defined as a sexual interest in a specific body part, act, or situation that isn’t considered sexual by most people. So, if you’ve always had a thing for feet, explore it during your next sexting encounter.
- Make Your Porn
Take some pictures of yourself as you act out your fantasy and send them to your partner to up the ante during your sexts. Or, if you’re feeling extra adventurous, take a video.
- Watch Ethical Porn Together
Try watching ethical porn together while you sext. You can even pretend you are certain characters in the porn. This is an excellent idea for people who are new to or anxious about sexting since it can help get their creative juices flowing.
- Try Role Play
Roleplay doesn’t have to be the same old trope of teacher and student or doctor and patient. It could be anything: bank teller and bank robber, superheroes and villains, librarian and guy with an overdue book, or whatever your imagination can think of.
- Do Something Daring
It can be liberating to do something risky, but it can also be disastrous. So, use some common sense and keep the context in mind. If exchanging spicy texts at work is something you can safely do, try it! It will give you something sexy to think about all day until you can see your partner. On the other hand, if it could get you fired, find a different avenue for your adventurous sexts.
- Buy Some Toys
Sex toys force you out of the box, and you get to experience new sensations. Teledildonic toys allow you to send each other sensations virtually—adding another level of excitement to your sexting exchange.
- Involve a Third
Yes, you can have a threesome sexting experience. And it’s quite a bit safer than having an in-person threesome. But when you do, make sure you choose a sexting site that protects your privacy and verifies the ages of all the people you would connect with.